1. Your technological reality

In Elder Bednar’s thought-provoking conference address “Things as They Really Are,” he discusses the potential advantage and danger of modern technology’s influence on our perception of truth. That is, how each of us perceives truth, or “reality,” which is invariable and eternal. Truth about who we are, who others are, what the world is, where we all belong in it, and, of course, our comprehension of the purpose of all of it. Each one of us was sent to earth to gain a body, and experience life, a central purpose of which is to learn eternal truth, or “things as they really are.” The advent of modern technology has allowed us to experience both new and old things in ways never before possible.

Elder Bednar numerates some fantastic examples: heart surgery simulation, virtual flight training and computer aided drafting methods. However, even more ubiquitous activities, such as worldwide communications, have dramatically changed the way we view the world. For example, I recently returned from a two LDS mission to Italy. Just over 20 years ago, my father returned from his own mission to Japan. A missionary’s final week is always an emotional experience, a strange mix of stress and excitement. As he packs his bags (which typically is an agonizing multi-day experience), he thinks with joy of his return to his homeland, family and friends. His giddy euphoria is usually punctuated with the pain of leaving behind the service and many friends he has found in the course of his mission, which he has grown to love.

Up to this point, my experience was probably not much different from my father’s. The difference was in how I perceived my severance from my new loved ones. For my father, who perceived the distance across the Pacific as so huge that the likelihood of reunion with the Japanese people was quite miniscule. I, however, live in a much smaller world. Not that the earth has geographically shrunk in the last 20 years; but for me, contact with my new friends was as simple as pulling out my list of Facebook names and making a video call. I can do that at anytime, in the space of a few seconds, with no real cost to me. The deeper effects of this shifted paradigm are a subject for another time, but to simplify, I am grateful for the fact that my relationships didn’t end when I walked through an airport terminal.

In addition to these advancements, which, as most would agree are highly advantageous to the world as a whole, the potential for negative effects is just as near. In our digital reality, we often do things we’ve never done before, and in some cases things which we would not or could not do in real life: admire the Amazon jungle, perform heart surgery, talk face to face with someone on a different continent in real time – or maybe just use a little more hurtful sarcasm than usual.

The virtual nature of our actions can at times give us a sense of anonymity or distance from our actions, leading to diminished accountability. This fact has given rise to the relatively modern trend of cyberbullying, or bullying online or through electronic messages. The disconnect of time, physical location, and seeming “anonymity” or security gained through digital methods of communication allows new people to bully new targets in new ways. According to DoSomething.org, “70% of students report seeing frequent bullying online.” That’s a lot of bullying taking place in a world of little social accountability or peacekeeping, made possible by the “new reality,” of the electronic world, which, in this case can simply be a cloak for what are very direct, real world consequences.

Other times, our behavior may seem to have little or no bearing on the real universe, such as behavior in video games or in virtual realities. While it is commonly believed that “it is only a game” or “it doesn’t affect me,” this idea is too often false. For example, a Stanford research project recently found that just 90 seconds spent chatting via avatars (virtual characters) is enough to elicit behavior changes in the real world. People who play with tall avatars are more aggressive; those with ugly characters are often less comfortable in a social context, while those with attractive avatars are more confident in real life romance. The same behavior which they unconsciously acquire in their “virtual” environment carries over with them. When “you” - that is your mind, your consciousness, etc. - comes out of the virtual world, and back into your body (where it belongs), it does not come back unchanged.

Elder Bednar warns that such inconsistency between our real identity and our virtual identity – or “personal fidelity” – leads to spiritual disaster when “its purpose or nature is distorted or wicked”. Elder Bednar’s article contains one seemingly extreme example of how this could take place, in which Mr. Hoogestraat neglects his real life relationship with his legal spouse in favor of his “virtual wife.” Given that one of our central purposes here on earth is to form and nourish eternal family units based on a husband and wife, neglecting our true  Let me give another quick example:

In 2013 the website The Verge published an article featuring a woman named Fee Berry. Berry is a stay at home mom who uses gaming to forget about real life. Berry describes her virtual reality gaming as “liberating,” in that it “[allows] her to forget about the kids, the responsibilities, and the extra few inches she’d rather not have.” In other words, Berry steps out of her real life world and into another, where none of her duties and familial relationships exist anymore. This is undisputably a “distortion” of the true reality is part of our divine purpose.

Of course, these examples seem extreme. I have chosen them for that reason for the sake of making a point. However, people neglect their real relationships every day, sacrificing real experiences for imprudent digital experiences, which are generally worth far less. At times, these digital experiences encourage detrimental “personal infidelity” by enticing them to do something they’d never do in real life (think of virtual violence, immorality, or unethical behavior).

The full extent of these activities’ influence remains to be seen. However, I think that it’s safe to say that those who don’t care to spend time with their family while they are together today probably won’t be getting together for Christmas anymore in twenty years. Why? Because our actions are influenced by our perception of reality, which can only be altered based on what we do, both in a virtual and real sense. If we spend our time virtually doing things we would not do with our physical bodies, why should we expect the results on our perspective of reality and our consequent and very real actions?